Shooting Star

On Saturday night the 14th of August, I saw my first shooting star. I caught a glimpse of it streaking by and the funny thing was I had to be looking up at that particular patch of sky at the perfect time to have been able to see it. To make that moment infinitely more poignant, a few minutes before seeing the shooting star I asked the Universe for a sign – something that would reaffirm a revelation that I had earlier that day.

I have asked for ‘signs’ so many times and yes, it is rather a Hollywood thing to wish for, but I am after a hopeless romantic, with dangerous theatrical tendencies! I’ve only ever received one other sign – that was after my dear dad passed away. After scattering his ashes, while driving back, I kept asking if he was at peace over and over again, so desperate for a sign that dad’s spirit was happy ... until I noticed the hundreds of little tiny yellow butterflies flying towards the windscreen of the car and then gliding right over the roof. What made it all the more absolute was that I had associated butterflies with dad just after he died when one rather stunning butterfly landed on the floor next to me and let me stroke its wing for a good few minutes (I used to be terrified of butterflies before that moment). So whether you believe in a higher force or not, or just believe that we manifest these things ourselves or even if you think it’s just a series of events, not predestined, getting a ‘sign’ which lift’s your spirit and gives you a surge of positive energy is still a pretty remarkable thing in itself.

So, what was the revelation that led to my seeing the shooting star? Curiously enough it was about destiny. Music is my destiny and while I intrinsically know this I have perhaps not necessarily owned it. There is a huge difference between knowing and owning your destiny; while you can believe that something is your destiny as much as is humanly possible when you relinquish ownership of it, it does not have the same potency, the same momentum as it could if it had your complete conviction. I think this dichotomy has to do with one’s upbringing and mine in particular was my early religious indoctrination. I was brought up to believe that God was in charge of my life – and while this was a help and comfort during my somewhat turbulent childhood, it has stopped me fully owning my destiny. However this teaching has been passed down generation to generation and I do believe it really does stop us taking control of our lives...

I was beginning to feel a strong desire to fully grasp my destiny, not in the way I had done in the past, but I needed to redefine my perception of my destiny. I realised I could achieve so much more if I took more control over it. My vocation is making music – it is my life, my ambition, the reason I was put on this earth, the reason this particular soul with all its variables came into being. So, as it my destiny is inexorably linked to my vocation and in turn my ambitions I had to ask myself some hard questions. I came up with the following set of questions:

1. What is my ambition?
2. What have I achieved thus far with regards to my ambition?
3. What is missing from my ambition?
4. What are the reasons the missing aspects of my ambitions have not been fulfilled yet? The answer based on fear
5. What are the reasons the missing aspects my ambitions have not been fulfilled yet? The answer based on fact

In answering these questions it became clear that my fears evolved around the belief that certain aspects of fulfilling my ambition and destiny lay in someone else’s hands (in my case the divine). With this knowledge a new comprehension began to form in my soul...I discussed my thoughts and feelings with my husband who is always my best sounding board – (he always comes up with a lot of amazing concepts) and together we uncovered with the following...

We hypothesized; perhaps when we are born, a little spark occurs in our souls (much like the beginning sparks of a star - when atoms of light elements are squeezed under enough pressure for their nuclei to undergo fusion). This little spark serves as a kind of guide as to what/who we have the potential to become – our talents, our gifts. Then as we grow and the paths our lives take begin to form our personalities we begin to make choices about our lives. Some of us follow that initial spark and some go against it – but throughout this phase the underlying fact is that we ourselves are shaping our future, our destiny; we create our own destiny. So, for me, with my early religious indoctrination it felt somewhat sacrilegious to think this way to begin with. While I knew this to be true in my heart and soul it was actually my mind that was being resistant to this to begin with – well such is the power of teaching a young mind! However, all it took for me to accept this new way of thinking was the undeniable truth that I had already been doing this for most of my life. I had in so many little and large ways been shaping my destiny.

So, now armed with all the right faculties I know that I shape my destiny, completely. While talent is a gift and blessing what I do with it is entirely up to me. We all get given gifts when we are born into this life, be it having the ability to make music, or to be a brilliant surgeon, or to have green fingers, or to be able to bake outstanding cakes ... these are all gifts. How we use these gifts is up to us; we can fulfil ambitions and reach our potentials in our lifetime, we just have to take ownership of our lives and our destiny.

Recommended songs for this article
1. Destiny – Prema ‘in Fusion’ (I have always had a strong relationship with my Destiny – sometimes even giving it an anthropomorphic personification! This song is about a transition of power - where I take the over the reins of my life from Destiny...I’m glad I’ve finally done that.) Available from iTunes

2. The Gift – Way Out West (This song is a blast from my past – it’s an homage to my shooting star!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mSJTIv4ZNvI